People Never Forget How You Made Them Feel.


By Morag Barrett on July 14, 2015

Posted by Morag Barrett | July 14, 2015People Never Forget How You Made Them Feel.Being at our best is about connecting with those around us, each and every day. However many of us forget to make this a priority and as such there is a consequence for our our personal and professional lives.I first heard the following quote as a teenager, and I have never forgotten it.I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. ― Maya AngelouThis quote can be applied to any situation in your life. Here are some examples that resonate for me.1. Bring the real YOU to Your PresentationWhen preparing for a presentation too often our starting point and initial focus is on what we are going to say and how we are going to say it. We think about our audience and how our message will be perceived. We worry about whether we will be a credible speaker? Will the audience be interested in what I have to say? While these are important questions to  consider before delivering an effective presentation, we are missing a critical ingredient.Of greater importance is how do you want your audience to feel after you speak? Recently, as a colleague was delivering a Powerful Presentations workshop for a client, I thought about something that I hadn’t considered before… Yes – the audience is interested in your message, but they really want to know you and understand who you are. They want to feel something. Do you have the courage to expose a little bit more about yourself through your presentation? I challenge you to focus less on the image your want to portray in your presentation and focus more on showing who you really are. If you bring “you” to your presentation, the audience will be more connected to your message.What can you do? Practice! If you practice and know your content, you can worry less about the words you are saying and focus more on being present and interacting with the audience. The more prepared you are, the more relaxed you will be.2. Get Your Head out of Your AppsI first saw this phrase on the electronic sign hanging over the highway as I drove to the airport. It’s a timely reminder not to focus on your phone when driving. However the advice is not only for drivers; it is for any of us when others are around. This immediately brings to mind the average business meeting when three quarters of the team are not paying attention – they have their head in their apps. Some are texting their friends, some working, others sending that one “quick” email, or possibly checking Facebook. Have you ever tried to explain something in a meeting and no one is paying attention? Even worse, did they ask you questions about what you just explained? How did you feel?Another example: Have you attended a one-on-one meeting and the other person (who is working on his computer and not looking at you) says, “Go ahead – I’m listening,” and then continues to work? This is when you begin speaking, hide the carefully crafted presentation you brought to share, and leave out half of what you were planning to say – only to have to repeat yourself and distill the message even further when he decides to actually join the conversation.Okay, I have been waiting to get this off of my chest for years; so, here we go…this is rude and unacceptable! I boldly proclaim that multitasking does NOT work when it comes to building effective relationships. You may think others don’t notice, but it sends a subtle message that this interaction is not important.What can you do? Be present in the conversation. Be alert in meetings. Listen! If someone is speaking to you, put your electronic devices away. Don’t interrupt time spent together to take a call, send a quick text, or email. Don’t end a phone conversation to take another incoming call. 3. What’s Going on Around You?Do you talk to and pay attention to the people who serve you meals or wash your car, and anyone else you encounter throughout your day? Are you talking on your phone when you go through the drive thru? Do you engage your front-line employees in conversation? Did you thank the security guard who helped you get into the building this morning when you forgot your badge? Did you look at the homeless person sitting outside of your office? Make a list of every single person you encountered in the last 24 hours. How was your interaction with each person? How did you make them feel? Did you bring your “whole self” to the conversation or were you simply rushing to get on to the next thing? I have my good days and bad days, but I am simply encouraging you to acknowledge where you are and begin to remember this simple idea that can make a world of difference.What can you do? Pay attention to others. Express gratitude to those who serve you every day. Be present with your colleagues, family, teammates, the people who serve you meals or wash your car, and anyone else you encounter throughout your day. Don’t miss the moment.Related ArticlesTags »Cultivating Winning RelationshipsEmotional Intelligencepublic speakingvalues Share
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